Monday, January 25, 2016

Hope VS. Fear---Is Fear stronger?

Poll On right!  Please comment w/ answer 5. Feel free to comment on ANY opinion!

Babies w/no choice

In rehab I met a woman 9 months pregnant. A heroin user. I always wondered if the baby (she lost to CPS?) would be ok. 

I'd love resources or advice. Could her baby survive a healthy life?? She always said if only I quit sooner he'd be healthy. Is that true? 

This subject has been brought up lot to me and I have no answers. Is a pregnant user going to have a damaged hurting baby no matter what? Does the trimester matter?


If you pray, please do so for her and her son. Thanks!

Victories-Come in Many Shapes & Sizes

Life issues can come at us from different perspectives, no matter what they are. For example, I won $10 on a $2 Lottery ticket. I only won $10 vs. I have $8 more than I did a few minutes ago. 

I have been to rehab 3 times since July 2015. Left early all 3 times and regretted it the second I hit the door.

Here is that word again.  FEAR.

Wow, I went to rehab 3 times this year. That's 3 more than last year, I even got 6 weeks off dope outta rehab.


Please reach out if u are in pain. If not to this blog- to someone. Somebody DOES CARE!!!

Backtracking an update

The Long gap in the time frames between my posts were present because of my relapses. Writing was something I was able to do for the year or so that I was off the wagon due to my  conciouss effort to journal what was taking place during my using days. Even though I did not publish my thoughts, I did my best to record them frequently. I decided long before the relapse that should I ever use in the future I wanted to be able to reflect on what was going on in my mind, and in my everyday life. I knew I could always type them up and publish them in my future. However if I did not write anything, I woulld certainly not look back, and my memory is certainly not up to par when I fry it daily.

That relapse was May 2014. Since then so mch has happened. Wanna know what?

Rehabs, Rehabs, A-walling, fear, rehabs, boys, unconditional love from mt father.

And the man. Who stole my heart and won't give up.

Next blog...about a boy... will tell this story.